It is funny when you are actually aware and not just think that you are aware of how much crap you have accumulated in life. It's like taking drugs. For those who have tried it, I am sure you know what I am on about. Or for those who drink to drown sorrows only to wake up with more pains than before. The things we do to avoid pain, anger, disappointment, sadness, strife, jealousy and sorrows but only to accept it we will never do.
It can't happen to me. I can't be unhappy so when that feeling of sadness or anger comes, we run and more often we blame. It is not my fault. We blame everything from our broken childhood to dominating parents to quota system for the the privileged to inconsiderate work mates to selfish teachers to our useless spouse to the driver next to us and the list is never ending. We spend so much time and effort blaming others only to feed our anger and negative thoughts.
Perhaps, we enjoy being in pain because in this state we feel comfortable. We are accustomed to it and we become numb. It takes a lot of effort to get out of it. Not because there is a better, bigger and sweeter reward when we do. But it is a fact that sinking in pain is unhealthy, almost insane. However looking at the state of humanity it is normal to be insane.
Nevertheless, if you can just step out of this madness and stop popping that pill. What there is is merely short term pleasure and not eternal love. The happiness you feel is temporary and once the situation changes, your entire kingdom of smiles collapses.
The junk we have absorbed is just too much. We move so much. Even when we rest our mind continues to be in neurotic spins. Thoughts from the past charges in to stir our stillness and worries for tomorrow never leave us.
Just be present. Don't think. Don't move. Just be here NOW.
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