Silly

The thoughts that haunt the mind come from the past and are projected into the future. What happened in the past accumulates and burdens the mind causing emotions to flare. Something as innocent as a pen on a table triggers the anger and hate for a friend. The mind builds them up by creating juicy visuals like a movie unfolding in a cinema. Such emotions are bodily reactions, which we can feel and they affect us negatively. Upon observation, these thoughts of the past have finished and what the mind imagines to occur in the future have not or will never happen. The unhappy situations involving the friend are over and what lives on are mere memories and a tarnished ego.

Isn't it ridiculous to hang on to previous pains and not only that, there seems to be a need to add more sorrows by continuing them in the future?

Eternal Surrender

It is funny when you are actually aware and not just think that you are aware of how much crap you have accumulated in life. It's like taking drugs. For those who have tried it, I am sure you know what I am on about. Or for those who drink to drown sorrows only to wake up with more pains than before. The things we do to avoid pain, anger, disappointment, sadness, strife, jealousy and sorrows but only to accept it we will never do.

It can't happen to me. I can't be unhappy so when that feeling of sadness or anger comes, we run and more often we blame. It is not my fault. We blame everything from our broken childhood to dominating parents to quota system for the the privileged to inconsiderate work mates to selfish teachers to our useless spouse to the driver next to us and the list is never ending. We spend so much time and effort blaming others only to feed our anger and negative thoughts.

Perhaps, we enjoy being in pain because in this state we feel comfortable. We are accustomed to it and we become numb. It takes a lot of effort to get out of it. Not because there is a better, bigger and sweeter reward when we do. But it is a fact that sinking in pain is unhealthy, almost insane. However looking at the state of humanity it is normal to be insane.

Nevertheless, if you can just step out of this madness and stop popping that pill. What there is is merely short term pleasure and not eternal love. The happiness you feel is temporary and once the situation changes, your entire kingdom of smiles collapses.

The junk we have absorbed is just too much. We move so much. Even when we rest our mind continues to be in neurotic spins. Thoughts from the past charges in to stir our stillness and worries for tomorrow never leave us.

Just be present. Don't think. Don't move. Just be here NOW.

I am.

It is an under statement. Until I experienced it I do not know. I merely have an idea of, or an identification with inspiring books and poetic quotes. At times of emergency the Being literally surges itself and everything remains as still and peaceful as it is. This is it. It is This. The non-mind is just there, where time does not operate I am "that" dissolves, disappears and I am is just there. Just I am. Not because I think, but I am.

I chose this because...

How to unite differing opinions? I am perplexed by the majority of people who believe that what they like or prefer is decided by their reason / logic. When are we ever reasonable when it comes to choosing or loving an object? (which includes people as well.) We talk ourselves into believing that we are logical based on past experience, the current situation and conditioning.

Let's take one thing at a time. What is past experience? Probably it is a memory that signals the failures and success we faced and should we find ourselves trapped in an awkard situations, we draw into our memory looking for a solution or guide. The other factors which are working at the same time are the influences in our daily life such as the neighbourhood we grew up in or the type of books we read.

I am sure you can agree that what we experienced and are influenced by the most ridiculous and if not abnormal instances that shape our thinking and logic. Then, how can what we like and dislike be based on reason or logic that is suppose to be flawless? Flawless in sense that what we do is truthful, sincere and righteous.

Actually, what we like or dislike appeals to our five senses - our feelings. Namely what we see, hear, taste, touch and smell. If we are logical no one would be smoking or drinking alcohol and there wouldn't be road rage and a 18 year old brother would not rape his 5 year sister.

Our natural state can be quite brutal. Ever held a gun in your hand? Watch how your heart pounds and thoughts start running wild in your head. Knowing that if you pull the triger and the gun is loaded, the life of a person who is standing in front of you is threatened. Now, imagine the person standing in front of you is your enemy. The person you hate most. Under such circumstances, what would you do?

Of course you may astutely say that you will never pull the triger or even hold a gun in your hand. But watch yourself. What are you doing? You are denying and escaping from the tendencies of the violence in you. Are we logical or merely surpressing our natural feelings that stimulate our senses?

You may think that supression is a logical way out. But think again. Is it logical? It is something that works on our feelings which in the first place is a mixed-bag of mumbo-jumbo. Denial is never a logical but only adds a layer to protecting or hiding the struggling natural state. Sooner or later what is boiling underneath will over flow and explode like a volcano.

Under what circumstances are we near being logical? Almost never. Every decision we make tends to satisfy our perpetually hungry five senses. From choosing which world religion to follow to our favorite singer. (Pun intended.) And even something as simple as what to eat for dinner.

You may think that I am cynical or even sinister. But it is a realisation that I must have and accept and do something about .

Good luck to you.

Everyone has problems with everyone

No wonder the youths are running away from the so-called industry experts. Because instead of showing enthusiasm and passion for the subject they wish to teach, they impose on and criticise the learners. More so for being irresponsible, lazy and when they don't think alike; they are out of the field.

Nevertheless, this is true for most if not all situations. Unless this particular group agrees to disagree, then no one is entitled to his or her opinion. Even if they agree to disagree, peace won't come because each participant is selfish. Each has an axe to grind, supported by greed and an urge to personally own the winning prize. Whatever the winning prize may be, from wealth to affection from another.

The bigger problem arises when the participants don't realise it. They don't or shall I say, refuse to acknowledge that they are causing a rift and seperating the group by being selfish and inconsiderate. They blame the rest for exhibiting the same negativity, which they themselves mastermind. Hiding information for personal reasons and being privy to certain information is to gain control over the others; these are some of the things that will inevitably tire or if not infuriate members of the same group.

The "togetherness" is destroyed. I personally hate it. Yes, hate is a strong word to use and I know I shouldn't allow it to bother me. But it does. Recently, one of my closer friends and I went to see a rather respectable martial artist. For simplicity's sake, let's call him Master. Due to some odd reasons, this Master told me that the next time I visit him, he does not wish for my friend to come along. Especially on the following appointment when an expert from China will be around. Master only wants to introduce me to this particular expert, which I found out in the end, he lacks the diplomacy, graciousness and mentality of a true practitioner.

I wonder if Master notices that I am pretty close to my friend and we both share a keen interest in martial arts. But he insisted that my friend does not have the right attitude for it and he is reluctant to teach her and if I mingle with her, he wouldnt teach me too. Finally, he found another student to pass on his skills to. And I am glad.

Because I won't betray my friend. Not for acquiring this skill or anything else. I don't put myself before others but this is no guarantee that others will do the same to me.

Such is life... but no regrets when the heart is true.

Ciao!

Help in all directions

It is not fair to mention names. There are too many and I don't want to leave out any so, it is wise that I don't even start listing. But the question I want to ask is, should everyone of them be read and known? In fact must there be consumption of written knowledge?

I have a strange suspicion that they are all speaking of the same thing. And in time to come, I will start conversing in the same tone and depth. But is that really transformation or a faking of status? Just because I do certain acts and use certain ornaments.

There are times when I do doubt what I am doing like now, for example.

But I have big dreams.

I just hope that I can handle them when they come true.

Wordless

Silence is also a conversation.

A difference

Everyone is in search of something; from material wealth to spiritual paths. But it is when we stop searching, that which we seek appears and enriches our life. Does this mean we give up our ambitions completely and forgo our dreams?

Not quite but before we pursue further in search of anything, the first step to take is to know ourselves better. Very often we don’t ever stop to evaluate who we are. We don’t go deeper than the superficial reflection in the mirror. Worse still, we deny what we see in the mirror and project a far more superior and perfect image of ourselves. If we don’t spend time and effort to know ourselves, all our endeavors in life will be pointless because we are always clouded by delusions; when we are not sincere but merely follow the crowd. The easiest thing to do is to imitate. The most difficult is to be original and creative.

It is only when you know yourself, then you know what you want. It is not about wanting something, but understanding and executing the meaning behind it. If you go on a frolic of pretending to be someone else all the time, the meaning will not reveal itself to you, no matter how hard you search and how far you go. For you will only be in darkness.

Believing in Love

She added just one more, enough to make him drowsy so that it would be easier.

Her heart beat was normal and her hands did not tremble because she was certain after this cup of coffee all will be back to normal.

"What are you doing, Mama?"

She turned and smiled at her son. Those eyes resembled his so much.

"Making Papa a cup of coffee. He likes them black. No milk."

"I want one too. What you make for Papa, I want the same."

Her hand stopped stirring the already foaming coffee. She looked at his tiny frame.

"It wouldn't be necessary. You are small. You will be simple."

Mind vs Heart

Vishvajit,

What happened between you and me can never be explained rationally. It is something, which drives my mind insane and disrupts my life continuously. It is simply unnatural. The problem increases when I try to logically factualise our relationship. No where can I locate a space to capture what we have now. At the pinnacle of it all, I then realise that this is not a matter of the mind but of the heart.

Manisha Savarna

The force in you

How lightly a vow is taken. A vow is not a spiritual contract, as many seem to think it is. A vow is an understanding and an actual action taken to transform the mind. This evolution occurs internally. Much has been said about what is internal and what is external. These are not mere words but have a nonlocal and transcendental connotation. When we actually sit down and quietly listen to ourselves and not judge based on environmental conditionings, perhaps this is knowing ourselves internally.

Under such circumstances, we make an honest pact with ourselves. We admit to our faults, shortcomings, attachments, ignorance and for once not justify our mistakes. And then, through this pact or vow a transformation to make connections with the higher-self comes into place.

The force in us is great. We can will many victories and also engage in many failures. But none of these are real. Because our minds actually only register electronic signals and not the object our eyes perceive. What we touch, taste, see, hear and smell are merely an intention to make them real and we know deep down, what we perceive and study as real is consequently a tiny drop of reality.

This vow that we make with ourselves, is an agreement to drop the sheild of rationalism and to go beyond what is empirical and factual. A plunge into the unknown, fearless, deathless, selfless and joyous rim. The force within us which, dances to the tune of nature links once again with the universal one .

Aristotle today

In my reading of Aristotle, his writings go back to approximately 2300 years ago, I notice that the problems he learnt are yet to be solved today. In fact we are drifting further and further away from answering anything substantial. As of now, we are attempting to decodify his desideratas and questions, giving birth to swarms of Aristotle scholars. Some defending and some antagonising. But mainly irrational and running against the wall of common sense, one way or the other.

It is true that once we start taking sides, we lose our sense of objectivity.

Whether reality preaches and explains itself or we are independent of a true reality outside the world we know, remains a maze. Quantum physics seem to take the Parmanedian theory by its' horns and state that a thing can be simultaneously is and is not. A potentiality until an observer brings it to reality.

Why didn't I study Metaphysics as a major, but Law?

How did I even come across Perennial Philosophy?

I literally was in bookshop, scrutinising the philosophy compartment and there it was - "Aldous Huxley's THE PERENNIAL PHILOSOPHY." It hit me in the face when I had no idea what the title referred to. Absorbed by an inexplicable burst of energy, I reached out my hand and my fingers gently grabbed the book. Took it safely in my possession, found a chair by the corner, sat down and read the first page. It sucked me into a vortex and left me spinning in amazement.

Meditation:
Purge all dust of ignorance and debacles of attachment from the soul. Don't get it wrong. It is not "them" but "me".

Manisha Savarna

Why tarry? Just go forth!

SANGHA speaks:

Why tarry? Just go forth!

Venerable Mangala was in the midst of his personal meditation retreat in Penang when he received a request from Venerable Aggacitta to share with the second Introduction to Monkhood Programme Participants (IMPPs), his experiences of monkhood as well as the practice of Abhidhamma as taught in the Pa Auk tradition.

Venerable Mangala was a law graduate from the University of Malaya, Malaysia.

Firstly, I guess many good potential candidates
for monkhood are held back by petty fears of
‘what ifs’. They fear they may fall, having seen
some very senior monks fall. They fear some
beloved ones may not be able to live well enough if they
renounced. Deep inside they feel they are indispensable
to the world they live in. So on and so forth.

Please tell them to have a better understanding and
faith in the Law of Cause and Effect. Please tell them
to contemplate on Dependent Origination and nonself.
Then all the fears can be easily dispelled. The
fears that triumph on illusion and delusion will find
no foothold to stand on. Then all decision-making will
be very simple. Fear no loss. Fear no outcome.
Why fear scorn or shame? The shame, if we want to
call it so, is in useless fear and indecision. When our
ego is big, we fear. Understanding non-self, why
indulge in fears? Just walk ahead. We have our kamma.
Others have their kamma.

If things do not work well, the worst is to disrobe.
Failure is never permanent. If we truly try—honestly—
there will be no real failure. Every day of brahmacariya
is meritorious, and is never cultivated in vain even if
we disrobe later. Just be honest to oneself in the
present moment. Be true to one’s present wisdom.
Attach not to anybody nor to anything.

Why hesitate? If we say detachment is one of the
greatest gifts we can give to the world, the only true
way to teach it, is by living it. Detachment can only be
taught in a detached manner. We cannot free others
without freeing ourselves. Another form of attachment
is craving for things, tangible or intangible, in life.
Sincere contemplation on death and impermanence is
enough to help us make a decisive turn from indulgence
in craving for material things and for other
aspects of Dhamma (i.e. mere intellectual theories or
views and preoccupations with worldly af fairs. Ed.)

When I was deliberating on becoming a monk, one
of the things I considered was, “Thirty or forty years
later will I regret the way I spend my youth now?”
This thought made everything else superficial and
tasteless. Conditional greatness is never great in the
stream of impermanence. So I decided, “If there is
anything that may be called great that I should do, it is
to help myself and others to realise the Deathless.”

Now, seven and a half years into monkhood, I am
still appreciative of this spiritual opportunity granted
by the Buddha.

May your vision materialise.
May SBS grow steadily.
May you be well and happy.

It is me...

My sweetheart, my darling and my love...
Thank you for coming back to my life.
Please don't wonder off too far.
I worry a whole lot about you.

Manisha Savarna

Even though reason is on your side, you must be forgiving;
even though justice is on your side, you must be soft-spoken.

Where have you been?

Oh! my sweet heart
my darling
my love
where are you?
I miss you...
I am only human.
I make mistakes too.
I think I said many words
which I shouldn't have.
I think I dreamt many dreams
when I should let things be.
Because good fortune only happens...once.

Manisha Savarna

No. 6

How does one use the Lovers
To replace the pigeon in flight
The crown and heart continues to fight
The atmosphere seems too right
To give up, to end and sleep at night.
The sun shines ahead, behind the Lovers,
but the atmosphere is an illusion of the might.

Sufism

The basic purpose of human existence is acquisition of knowledge of God; there is no relationship more true than this spiritual affiliation. All other types of relationships are but derivative and dependent upon that spiritual connection, and in themselves nothing to boast of .

.-Lahiji: "Mafatih"

From "The Wisdom of Sufism," compiled by Leonard Lewisohn

Two out

I sent another hope and fear to Dr. E
Another trial and tribulation for my dumb action
Some time I have been silent
Until a splinter enters the skin
Crawling and generating
Testing and laughing
But this round I will win
Because I tap with no expectation
Only blessings and a genuine notion.

Manisha Savarna.

Things that Matter

Practically we are all so busy doing and acquiring things and more things. Things that we assume we need; from the physical to the spiritual. Everything matters.

We are forever trying to become better, improve our status, move forward, progress to a higher level and accumulate items that we term "essential."

Education (I want to make it to Harvard, Cambridge, USC whatever...), cars (I want a Benz, Ferrari whatever), house (I want a mansion!) and the funny thing is, we will never get enough.

So we keep on searching and becoming. We look at things from outside and deem that things shouldn't change. Things are always the same. But in reality they do. Our reality is the fantasy that our mind build and the nature, which draft the conditions.

But who dares to break away? Who steps out of the successful castle of fame, money and sex? We are all as carnal as ever. We only want three things in life, but never dare to admit our shallowness. We want fame, money and sex.

Fame, which satisfies our ego and uncontrolled optimism. Money which buys us material wealth and comfort. Sex that fulfills our sensual pleasures.

Nevertheless, we find that we can never have enough no matter how much we collect; even when there is a profit.

We continue in the pursuit for things that matter...

A perfect cycle nonetheless.

Zen Master

Two Zen monks who are looking at a flag waving in the air are arguing and they both assert that each one is correct. One insists that "The flag is moving." The other is determined that "The wind is moving."

Then, the Master upon hearing their loud voices appeared. They approached their Master and asked him to decide, who is right.

"I say that the flag is moving."

"No! How can the flag move on it's own. The wind is moving causing the flag to move along with it."

The Master smiled and said, "You are both wrong. Only consciousness is moving."